[That...actually makes him visibly brighten. Good riddance, he wants to say, but he bites his tongue to stop himself from doing so. Instead he moves to settle himself in Eren's lap, resting his head against the boy's shoulder.]
I want to. I want to be with you, Eren. [He finds one of Eren's hands, lacing their fingers together instinctively.] I told Jean and Marco I'd go back, though...
So it seems. At the very least, she hasn't been here.
[ Though, he's pretty damn sure she is gone gone. She didn't have any reason to avoid him.
He welcomes Armin into his lap, scooting his legs so he can sit on him comfortably. He lets Armin grasp his hands and presses his cheek against his head.]
So? Fuck 'em, for now. It's not worth you feeling even worse... just stay with me.
[ Eren's hand leave Armin's to encompass him again, fingers burrowing into Armin's hair to press at his neck as his other palm settles on his side, arm firmly around his back. ]
Right now, don't do anything. Just.... breathe. Calm down.
[ Eren, for once, does not know what the right answer is either. He doesn't even know if what he's doing right now is really helping anything in the long run, but all he can feel himself focus on is Armin and how tight his body is against him and that's enough to draw actions from him, at least. If he can at least calm him down, the most immediate issue, maybe other solutions will arise from it. ]
[There's a long sigh after a good few minutes pass and Armin's calmed down a bit more. He feels utterly pathetic like this, practically moping on Eren just because he can't get his shit together or deal with it, as it were. One would think after living here for a few months it'd be easier instead of more difficult. The opposite seemed to be true in Armin's case.]
[ Eren just rests there, stroking Armin's hair and the nape of his neck with his fingers, pulling out any patience he had as a person to put into this moment. ]
.... The moment Jean decided to tie himself that closely to Marco again, he already set himself up to be hurt. He'll have to deal with it. He'll have to deal with that and he'll have to deal with it the moment Bertolt stops playing off his innocence and sees an opening for home.
That's the moment he'll betray humanity again, whether either of them want to accept it or not.
[ Eren tightens his jaw, knowing his chest hurts. He might be giving Marco a free pass, but the fact that both of them are siding with Bertolt hurts.
If he was gone, would they even be trustworthy enough to protect Armin from Bertolt, with that ambivalence? He pulls Armin more tightly to him and gives him a soft squeeze. ]
Try not to worry about them anymore tonight. You said it before... in the end, we only have each other, especially in this world. Let's... try to remember that. We're the only ones who could part each other from loneliness before... and it'll probably always be that way. Just our little family...
[All Armin can do is nod and agree, letting himself be coddled by Eren. It was becoming more and more apparent, as much as Armin didn't want it to - Eren was, once again, the only person that he could entirely depend on, no matter what. Just them.]
I'll try not to think about it...we only have each other.
[ Eren kisses Armin's head again, breathing in his scent. His presence, more than anyone's calmed him down when he felt his heart going wild. He lets his fingers start to stroke through Armin's hair rhythmically. ]
[At least, that seemed to be the case. If there was one person who would always have his back and would be ready to literally die for him (as much as Armin hoped he never would - living through that trauma once was enough for him, thank you very much) it would be the boy he was currently curled up on.]
[ Eren doesn't want it to be this way. He wants a world expanded beyond 'them'. He doesn't have to belong anywhere, but he wants to be accepted. He wants unity, camaraderie, and all that comes with it, but here he seems to be losing it. He remembers hearing everyone pleading with Bert and Reiner, giving them a chance to turn back from everything. And maybe... in that moment, he'd given them a chance, too. But, they'd rejected it. They'd rejected everything, including him, and it's inexcusable. But he and Armin seem to be the only ones that have felt through those moments... and so, maybe that does kind of set them aside, make them alone.
He huffs and noses at Armin's soft hair, stroking it with his fingers. ]
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Action;
[That...actually makes him visibly brighten. Good riddance, he wants to say, but he bites his tongue to stop himself from doing so. Instead he moves to settle himself in Eren's lap, resting his head against the boy's shoulder.]
I want to. I want to be with you, Eren. [He finds one of Eren's hands, lacing their fingers together instinctively.] I told Jean and Marco I'd go back, though...
Action;
[ Though, he's pretty damn sure she is gone gone. She didn't have any reason to avoid him.
He welcomes Armin into his lap, scooting his legs so he can sit on him comfortably. He lets Armin grasp his hands and presses his cheek against his head.]
So? Fuck 'em, for now. It's not worth you feeling even worse... just stay with me.
Action;
[He folds himself into place on Eren's lap, burying his face into the crook of his friend's neck even further.]
...I don't know what to do, Eren.
Action;
Right now, don't do anything. Just.... breathe. Calm down.
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[Breathe in, breathe out. It's what he does, quietly, doing his best to relax and melt against his friend, enjoying the feel of fingers in his hair.]
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[ Eren, for once, does not know what the right answer is either. He doesn't even know if what he's doing right now is really helping anything in the long run, but all he can feel himself focus on is Armin and how tight his body is against him and that's enough to draw actions from him, at least. If he can at least calm him down, the most immediate issue, maybe other solutions will arise from it. ]
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I'm calm now...I think.
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You think?
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I started a fight with Marco.
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[ He'd talked about it with Marco, sure, while they were sitting in quiet but he didn't think ARMIN started it with MARCO. ]
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He's dead. He has a free ticket to do without consequence to himself because honestly, what's the worst that can happen? He'll die again?
You probably don't want to hear that, but that's how it is, really....
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...I know that, I guess, but I don't want Jean to end up hurt.
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That's the moment he'll betray humanity again, whether either of them want to accept it or not.
[ Eren tightens his jaw, knowing his chest hurts. He might be giving Marco a free pass, but the fact that both of them are siding with Bertolt hurts.
If he was gone, would they even be trustworthy enough to protect Armin from Bertolt, with that ambivalence? He pulls Armin more tightly to him and gives him a soft squeeze. ]
Try not to worry about them anymore tonight. You said it before... in the end, we only have each other, especially in this world. Let's... try to remember that. We're the only ones who could part each other from loneliness before... and it'll probably always be that way. Just our little family...
Action;
I'll try not to think about it...we only have each other.
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I promise you can rely on me.
Action;
[At least, that seemed to be the case. If there was one person who would always have his back and would be ready to literally die for him (as much as Armin hoped he never would - living through that trauma once was enough for him, thank you very much) it would be the boy he was currently curled up on.]
Action;
He huffs and noses at Armin's soft hair, stroking it with his fingers. ]
I wish it wasn't that way for you.